Career Coaching: Triggered! I had no idea how hard I find it to ask for help. How did I learn this? I learned this when I needed some minor medical attention from the NHS. Referred to a ‘fast track service’ just before I went abroad for a fortnight, I arrived home to find that my appointment had come and gone without me even knowing. They didn’t know about my holiday. The appointment given was when I was abroad. I found I was trapped in a loop that I couldn’t exit.

“I had no idea how hard I find it to ask for help.”

Every letter had a different telephone number on it. Each number I rang took half an hour to be answered. Each number was the wrong one. The people I spoke to were all overworked and stressed. They didn’t have the information I needed – how can you not know who your patients need to call to rebook an appointment?

After a couple of hours, I was told that there were “No clinics at all”. Told I “would have to call back next week when the new lot had been released”. I was in tears. Tears of fear but mostly tears of frustration. How could this be so difficult if I was already in the system? I felt VERY alone.

Career Coaching: Triggered

Triggered? Hell Yeah! I was triggered! Here I was showing up to do hard scary things like having tests. I was doing my best. And, then the authorities are telling me it’s not possible.

After weeping (grrr!!) it took my husband to remind me I could call the Dr. And, I even fought that: “What’s the Dr going to do – If there are no clinics, there are no clinics.” I felt foolish/needy/guilty involving the Dr again. Good girls don’t bother the Dr! Really triggered. However, disturb the Dr. I did nonetheless. When he called back, he was incredibly kind. “No, need to re-refer, you are still in the system. However, we owe you an apology – I can see the dept was not told of your holiday. That’s added to the confusion. I’m sorry’ and ‘if you haven’t got it sorted by Monday, do call us back & I’ll intervene”.



That was new. An apology from the Dr. That took the wind Right out of my sails! I also felt heard. That helped. That helped me climb down out of my triggered place. The next day I called back on the dot of 8.30 again, while there were still no clinics (!!) I had got through in under ten minutes. I spoke to a kind and calm person who offered to add me to the list to be called back when there WERE clinics… today I got that call.

What would I do differently next time? Ask for help MUCH earlier, to begin with – when I first experienced the pain. Get over my god girl; don’t bother the Dr beliefs and put myself first. I would interrupt the cycle much earlier and not wait until I am in crisis mode, And if I had to, YES call the Dr for reassurance – that precisely what I got! And it made the rest of it so much easier.

I hate it when I get triggered. It’s so powerful!!!! Sometimes I need to ask for help to climb back down into ordinary reality and do the adult things again.

What’s triggered you recently? I’d love to know.

You can find Rebecca at the Daemon Career Coach.