What To Do With Self Doubt

It is all too easy to compare your inside with other people’s outside and come off much the worse for doing so. Because you live inside yourself, you see all the vulnerabilities and fears and flaws. We are also not best equipped to see our own skills and talents somehow.
When we look at other’s outsides we see (mostly), only what they wish to see. It would be daft, if not unsafe, for everyone to walk around talking of all their vulnerability all of the time.So in this manner, when we compare ourselves the metrics are not balanced. What we know of ourselves, and what others show of themselves, are two totally different things.
Add the competitive pressure of social media and the same dynamic is compounded. Ever looked at Facebook on a bad day and wondered why everyone else seems to have such exciting lives? Or looked at LinkedIn when you are unhappy with your job, and wondered how everybody got so skilled and sorted?
My advice is to avoid, avoid, avoid engaging with this at all when things feel rough. However skilled we are some days will feel rough for one reason or another. Work might be challenging, we might be in transition, we might just be flippin tired. These not times to engage with anything that will have ya feeling ‘less than’ anyone else. We have our own internal battles to win.

On these days, in my not so humble opinion (!) it is worth staying really close to the ground. Stay close to the people who hold you in good heart, stay close to colleagues who have your best interests at heart, and overall be very kind to yourself. Imagine how you would treat someone else who has your feelings? Would you force someone that you love to face the rat race if they were feeling fragile or frayed? Or might you advise something more nourishing instead? Apply to self!
Only when you feel strong is it a good idea to begin to step out into the competitive world of social media and comparing yourself with external metrics. Only when you are a good place can you see people’s appearance fur what it really is. It is the protective layer with which every person surrounds themselves in order to be safe enough to function in this world.
How do I know this? Because day in and day out I world with brilliant and talented individuals who have ethics and values and are as skilled and capable as can be. These people make beauty manifest in the world and yet they are STILL filled with agonising self doubt on a down day. We all have our down days so when you do, please refrain from comparing your inside self with others preened outsides. 

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